I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
