I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
