Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(704): View more from North Carolina

We named our party play list daddy issues

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(917): View more from New York City

i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?

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(514): View more from Quebec

Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?

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(801): View more from Utah

Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.

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(914): View more from New York

I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out

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(310): View more from California

Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.

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(512): View more from Texas

i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.

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(845): View more from New York

I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"

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(708): View more from Illinois

I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves

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