I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
