I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
