I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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