I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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