I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
