He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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