were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize