it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Randomize
