We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
