wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
