I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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