drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
