why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
it's not cheating when I paid for it
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
