i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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