Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I wish i was in the wii world.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
