Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Randomize
