It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
