That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
