Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize