More tranny stories later!
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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