apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
