My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Don't EVER smell your tampon
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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