dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
