The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Randomize
