I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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