True but thats because hes a fetus.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
