i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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