I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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