SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
