"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
