We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Randomize
