wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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