How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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