why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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