So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
