Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
