im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize