you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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