butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Randomize
