I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
