I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
vagina is talking i cant
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I think people are normalizing furries
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize