I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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