Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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