just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
