I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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