R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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