I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
