Are we in a gay sports bar?
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
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