Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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